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[12 Sep 2005|05:59pm] |
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went to alan sousa's house last night for a break up party it was pretty fun i miss hangin out with those kids. they break out the guitar and bust out rhymes its bad ass but whatever i had school today didn't do my homework already off to a bad start i won't do it again i swear i just wanted to go out i guess. alright peace out gangstas
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heaven sent
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[06 Sep 2005|08:23pm] |
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mood |
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 bored |
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music |
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kanye west/late registration |
] |
another semester of school has started and i want to do good this year no more bullshit i really want to do good. and find another job so i can pay some bills.
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1 are  heaven sent
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[10 Mar 2005|10:02pm] |
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ive changed what a shocker but do i like the person ive become. if i could go back would i. but i have learned some things never change. some friends i will always have if i ever did need them. some loves will always be a call away angry or not. home will always be just that home. people you grow up with you will grow old with. i wish i could leave for awhile just get away for everything familiar and go. just start my life or my dreams. i cant wait to see what the future will bring. and anyone who thinks i have forgotten them i really have. im just trying to figure my life out, what is really good for me.
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3 are heaven sent
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| if i could change one day in history this would be the one |
[04 Feb 2005|11:45am] |
oh my god [18 Oct 2003|10:36pm]
[ mood | silly ]
[ music | nothing ]
I had THE MOST FUN LAST NIGHT. No, I'm being serious.. I haven't laughed or had that much fun since back at Bristol Aggie.
Rachael and I bonded last night for the first time since I met her in the middle of last year. And it was fucking great. She is such a funny and real person. We never had nothing to talk about and we're WICKED hott!!! jkjk Everytime we walked past a guy they would start shouting or staring at us and it was great.
So, last night I get out of work and it's late but I'm not bored and I DON'T feel lyk sitting around on my ass all night. So I notice the Rachael online and we IM each other talking about how miserable we are. To make a long story short I went and picked her up in Fairhaven at 10 at night and we went to go find shyt to do. We went to her sisters apartment and such and then to Wendy's and by the time midnight rolls around we are CRAVING for something to do. We call everyone we know practically and it just doesn't seem lyk it's gonna happen. So we figure.. let's go to the club. By the time we get there it will be one and most club and by then it will be bumpin right? ahaha... so Rachael wakes poor Katie Mello up in the middle of the night to get some random I.D. for me.. since u know.. I'm not 18. And since it was drizzling out she actually put the I.D. in a sandwich baggie. It was a great experience. So we get to Club Hell and it SUCKS. I WASTED FIVE BUCKS ON SHIT. -lol- But that's okay. So we decide to leave cus it really is THAT lame. So we now must decide where the fuck to go. I didn't want to go to some random club. I wanted to go somewhere that wasn't a normal club. So we found.. THE GAY BAR.
OH
MY
GOD
It was so fucking wonderful. A bunch of hott half-naked men we're all bumping and grinding and sharing the love. It was most excellent. Although, I do wish I was cocked off my ass.. I still had a hell of a lot of fun. -lol-
I met the cutest gay guys Billy and Justin. WICKED HOTT...::dies:: And they we're the most adorable people ever in the entire world. Rachael thinks Justin was hitting on me and he's probably bi.. but uhm.. he was also dancing with Billy. AND THAT WAS FINE BY ME! Billy said Rachael and I made a good couple and it was a shame she wasn't my girlfriend. -lol-
And all I kept thinking was... Fi.. would fucking love this. Ohkay.. I know she likes drag-queens.. but she also likes skinny men who look questionably gay.. and if I told you how many Simon from the Real World look alikes there were.. she would die. Ohkay.. so maybe I'm exaggerating.. so what. All I need to do is get her cocked and she'd have a good time too. So I want to go next Friday but I wanna go to 80s night too... this single life is getting better and better. Even if I am getting hit on by gay men.. WHO CARES?
Went to Thayer Street this afternoon and Rachael got her lip pierced. It makes me want to get a labret peircing or a double nose piercing on the same side. They had this book of pictures from brands and piercings they did and I saw these wicked weird clits and penisis. I will never let a metal object touch my no-no spot.
And this... is my life.
-kayte
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1 are heaven sent
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[21 Dec 2004|09:31am] |
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I played hockey last night ive realize i'm out of shape and i miss that game i need to play more.i love hockey.
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6 are heaven sent
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[21 Dec 2004|09:04am] |
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i'm missing something and i think i know what it is but do i want to admit it? i need help?
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1 are heaven sent
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[29 Nov 2004|01:18pm] |
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how does someone go from being so happy to so sad like that...were there any steps to get from here to there. there aren't many things i can do now that don't upset me what the fuck is wrong with me. is it school, is it friends or is it both that make me feel this way. a year ago i would have never guessed i would be here typing this but look. people say i've changed alright i have we all have. am i the ignorant one or you. are you happy cause i'm not. people that i never thought would be there are. i guess we all find our own paths after we walk across that stage. some paths are better then others some we choose some are choosen for us. who is to say that i was a better person then. i guess i've grown up and i can't stop it why do you think you can. i've made my choices to become what i've become and is it fun. let me tell you its not. depression kicks in around noon and boredom around 4. just another day to fuck up at school. all i can really say is i'll be happier tommorrow.....
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1 are heaven sent
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[03 Nov 2004|11:03am] |
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so i look in my live journal today and 8 new comments
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3 are heaven sent
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[15 Sep 2004|02:08pm] |
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i never write in this damn thing but today i feel like writing so here i go. i hate when people blame actions on other people like if they werent there things like that would never happen. well that is a load of bullshit. what would the acuse this time be. i was to drunk i dont remember anything. heard that one before and i also heard im not like that anymore. keep sayin stuff like that i was starting to believe. but no not anymore you proved yourself wrong you havent changed. your the same person you were months ago. at least you had the courage to let me watch these anticts first hand this time not live them vicariously threw other people like times before. ive know how you are and now ive seen it first hand. and you probablly dont remember me there but i was. completly sober watch you stager around looking for your next victim. im just glad i got to see it and not have others tell me a half ass story where things are held back just in case my feelings might get hurt or i might get mad well fuck that bullshit if i wanted to be sheltered i would not ask questions and live in a bubble. yes a bubble were nothing will hurt me and happiness is neverending. that would be great my very own bubble. i guess you could say ive changed, which i have im not the same person but when i wake up from a night of drinking i remember what i did and how it might effect people. im in some control of my actions and who is around me and what is goin on. i would love to say the same about other people. well now all my entries are either depressing or angry. that is wonderful im not normally like this its just that is when i write....
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9 are heaven sent
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| what the fuck |
[31 May 2004|06:50pm] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
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music |
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solitude |
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it hasnt been a very good day. today i found out some really bad news. i guess i saw it comin but not so soon. at 12 today my grandpa joe died. i feel like an ass cause he has been in the hospital for a while now and i never went to see him. its not that i dont care about him its that i cant stand to see people at there worst. he was my last grandfather and i never called him that. i know he was my moms step father but he has been there ever since i was born so he is my grandpa joe. the one i will regret the most is not calling him grandpa.....
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8 are heaven sent
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| no idea what to do, do you? |
[24 May 2004|10:16pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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i dont know what to do anymore i never really know waht to say how to say it. it just seemed so easy before. it was easy to forget maybe cause there was no love in my heart before. my life seems empty i miss the warmth of her body at night. but what do i do that warmth hurt me more then anything has ever hurt me before. its just i have changed i will admit that part is not being happy part is confusion. but admit you have changed you have to im am not the only one. when i met you i werent like you are today. you never thought someone like me or anyone would make such a impact on you. well i did and i gave you as much as i could i thought we were happy i thought we were PERFECT as everyone thinks i am. i never thought one person could have such an effect on my life as you did. i fell for you hard i never felt the butterflies that i did with you. from the moment you lied in me arms when you used to shake. i know i never wanted anything to happen to you. i know no one will ever make me feel that way again but i do need to look. you say i will find someone else that would treat me better. why would i want such a perfect life i like not knowing. who knows what will happen six months from know. im just scared everthing i have ever said about this relationship has come true. would you be happy in a year five or ten. would i be happy witout even going out there to see. i have no desire do sex with any other girls. but can they make me feel the way that i did when i was holding your quivering body i know you questioned this relationship you would have never done what you did if you didnt. the only thing that im afraid of is that you will stick me back there with the rest of your friends like tykela and all your other best friends cause i know i mean more then that. you say my parents will be happy with anyone i bring home but the question is will i.
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heaven sent
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| yeah i told you hoe |
[05 Apr 2004|10:27pm] |
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mood |
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 cheerful |
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i had a good weekend this week. on saturday a went to look for more puppies and i saw this one that was awesome and i wanted it so bad. i playied with it and then i decided to buy my little friend....
so now i have what i wanted for so long a cute little puppy. its is awesome its name is axel. i love it and it will be my new best friend in the world and we will never part with each other...
its gonna be so much fun when he gets bigger and he comes with me every where....
that is the biggest thing that has happened to me and everything else doesnt compare to my new puppy axel...
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2 are heaven sent
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| fuck off shit head |
[02 Apr 2004|12:04am] |
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mood |
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thirsty |
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music |
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bon jovi |
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so i was this close to buying a puppy today. i was so happy. it was a beagle and it was awesome. i took my mom to look at it and she liked it. i was all ready to charge it when the guy said it was sick it had phenomia and he didnt think it should be around my dog. so upseting. so now that i know i can have a dog the search continues. its not that good that im gonna buy a dog when i just bought a hampster like two days ago. but whatever it was a spur of the moment kind of thing. but now im gettin a puppy. and the sad part of this is if i get a puppy my sister is gonna bitch. sucks to be her she is gettin a kitten so what does she have to bitch about she should be out by now. well im off to bed. if this hampster wakes me up i swear to god...
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2 are heaven sent
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| your so much pretty then me |
[28 Mar 2004|03:29am] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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am i an asshole. or did i just stop caring. what the fuck is wrong with me an why do i feel this way right now. i want something so bad i cant have and if i had it how long would it last.
what do i do with those chills that go up and down my spine everytime there is a scrath that is itched just the right way. what do i do when i say no and i want it more then you. when everyday i just cant help but be emo cause i dont know how to feel any other way.
i just cant take the way things are lookin to end up. i never want to see that feeling go. nothing will ever feel the same not just with me but with you......
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2 are heaven sent
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| well well |
[21 Mar 2004|10:46pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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pretty girls make graves |
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i worked as a shot boy for the first time on thursday. me and ben were goin to do it together but he didnt want to last minute. i figured it would be me that wouldnt want to do it. but it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. sure i was thouched in uncomfortable places but that was expected.
my week was not that good im sick of everyone and everything. and im sad go figure. i went shopping alot this week maybe cause i like to shop and it makes me feel better.
i hate how people have such an impact on your life. when you think about them all the time and you can never really truely have them the way you want them. maybe its just unfair the way life works. maybe im to forgiving but i think that is good in some ways and a fault in others.
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2 are heaven sent
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| yeah ok |
[18 Mar 2004|07:25pm] |
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so me and ben are goin to be shot boys tonight. its sad what people will do for money isnt it...
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heaven sent
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| RIP |
[13 Mar 2004|09:45pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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music |
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emo what else at times like this |
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so in sad news my turtle died. sadest day of my life. i dont know what the point of life is anymore. we swim around just like little turtles day in and day out just to see the same things. what is the point. now i need to bury my beloved turtle in the backyard no his favorite rock and morn his death. maybe ill say a few things well i got to go im not very happy and i think im goin to cry.....
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1 are heaven sent
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| pissed |
[09 Mar 2004|09:26pm] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
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music |
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nothing |
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so i bought the movie cocktails today the one with tom cruise yup tom cruise and i put it in and my dvd player doesnt work. fuck dvd and there shitty players. yup ther is my graduation gift great. my parents cant even get me a good one its a peice of shit if i could i would throw it out my window into traffic...yup i cant even watch tom cruise tonight...this night sucks
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heaven sent
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hot_n_sexy's journal